Day 9
Today started similar to yesterday. Dashing off to the bathroom and then downing the swf. I felt sleepy after the effects of the swf was over and went back to bed. I awoke around 3:30pm and had my lemonade.
Energy wise I felt normal but tonight I've been feeling really blah. Sad or depressed. Depression is something I suffer from. I think the pain from the fall and missing work is getting to me. It puts me behind my schedule and I am sure my manager is annoyed with me...it really bums me out.
Cravings for foods are there, just like yesterday. I think I am getting really fed up of drinking this stuff and it's kinda getting to me. At home they cooked lentil stew and basmati rice. At first I found the smells to be really repulsive and wanted to throw up. But when I saw it cooked and could smell it up close...I had the thought to just taste some. No one would know lol. But I ignored those thoughts.
Tomorrow is day 10 and my intention was to try and survive 10 days, but go longer if I can. Maybe even until 40 days. The way I am feeling tonight is discouraging but I have no intention of breaking my fast early. I think I'm upset that I'm now struggling with food cravings, because tbh the first 7-8 days have been so easy. I thought the rest of the fast would get easier the more time passed. But it seems to be getting more difficult. Feeling really frustrated, irritable, sad. I am proud of myself for having come so far and finding the will power to stick it out.
Weigh in after swf: 183.4lbs
Bit of a bright spot: I noticed today that the skin tags under my eyes are gone
Some motivation to keep me going