Day 1:
SW: 164.0 (ht: 5'6")
CW: 164.0
GW at end of this cleanse: 154.0
Hi everyone. I figure journaling publicly about this cleanse attempt (it iiiis still an attempt), will help motivate me. I was feeling really good today until about noon (I wake up at 5:30- am every morning). it's 2:45 pm right now and I could eat my arm! Thankfully my cats still look inedible. I probably should not have started the day with 30 minutes on the elliptical trainer....oops. I'm not telling my family and friends that I am doing this because they will think I'm nuts. My brother is an especially bad influence on me. I usually hang out with him twice a week but I'm keeping him away until I finish these 10 days at least. Of course I was invited to a birthday at a bar this morning of someone I barely know. Of course. I declined but waaaaaaaah. My mind keeps saying "well, what if you just have some stew" (there's leftover stew in the fridge,) or "some celery" or "why don't you just start a keto diet tomorrow?"
I've put on about 38 pounds since starting grad school and suffering from runner's knee and sciatica over a seven year period. I have always been very active and although my weight fluctuated when I went to undergrad, I have never been this heavy or unhappy. I'm not sure the MC is the healthiest thing, I half- buy into the cleansing explanation, but I need a jumpstart on my weight loss to motivate me. Also, since gaining weight I eat more an more unhealthily and emotionally (funny how that goes eh?). I figure this will be a needed practice on what hungry physically versus emotionally (or just due to habit) means.
I tried the SWF and I'm not sure if I'll do that again at least until friday. I had a terrible throw up worthy taste in my mouth for hours and I can't have that at work. I really don't want to be rushing to pass water at work ( I work monday- friday) either and I passed basically just water for three- four hours. I aaam doing the smooth move tea. I bought Vibrant Cleanse (3 of them) which is the powdered form of the lemonade so I don't have any more excuses than I need to veer from the diet.
Honestly, I don't believe I can do this so let's see how long I last. I feel like crap now but I also just never follow through on diets past like 3 days so I'm not going be one who's all gung ho and then dissapears. We shall see... the thing that's motivating me the most is that I'm flying to visit friends and family on the 9th and I'm seeing a friend first who I haven't seen in four years and last time I saw her I weighed like 139 (which I was self- conscious about at the time- silly me). Shame is not the healthiest motivator, but it's a darn powerful one! After I visit her, if I can actually do this (which I still don't think I can), I would love to finish out June from June 15th- June 30th (eating super healthy between 6/10 and 5/15- but without disdain from my family)- so I can lose another 15 pounds.
I really want a sausage.
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