<not related to MC journal entry - no need to read>
Sooo how shall I put this... I find that while on the MC and posting on here I like to throw my thoughts down on e-paper as to what is going on in my current life. Because there are outside influences that do affect your health and functionality! Plus I type super fast, so why not-mini blog on my own existing thread lol.
So here we go!
In August after leaving the ex, as I've said totally binge ate and drank and all of that terrible stuff. Burned up savings while couch surfing for a few months, and ended up rooming with a gf of mine whom I roomed with 10 years ago when we were 16. They just happened to be looking for a 2 bdrm apartment and could use a lil bit of extra income saved. VOILA. The management of the complex totally fubared everything in terms of getting us the 2 bdrm so they gave us a 1 bdrm to store belongings in to / crash at in the interim. Seeing as the roomies (a couple) were still in a condo I had some alone time available before they moved their belongings in and started staying there.
During that time the new boy and I (known eachother for a few years, just not closely) were doing the puppy love court-ship along with the dirty deeds. I had nothing to my name. No bed... no blankets, just clothes and the tv, xbox, computer and misc belongings. We were happier than a whole fleet of pigs in mud! Seeing as he lives with his family, doing his young professional development whilst saving so we never had alone time as a 'couple'. It never occured to me just how important that was. But really, we sat there on the floor while I cooked with the 1 pan available at the time, a bottle of cap'n morgan and played games along with various other activities
. STILL happier than anything.. anyway once the roomates moved in in Nov, it became a cramped house (1 bdrm, the couple and i and their THREE ferrets), still the man would find time to visit and we'd make due with zero privacy. No biggie. So that's that back story.
Since Dec-untl now, lets just say the roomate situation has developed and just by walking in to the apartment it carries a bad vibe, and of course never any privacy if he comes over. Sure people may be reading this and thinking 'bah, stop your whining' but there are a lot of things that have happened to warrant my dumping on this
For example; the fiance of my gf COMPLETELY lost his shiat when I left one small baking pan and one small pot out on the counter after cooking. It was there for maybe 1.5 hours but all of the other pots and pans were out because my gf has a thing where she likes to store all the pots and pans in the oven. Well..having just used the oven it was scorching hot and at the risk of someone going in there and nabbing an ember hot handle I kept them out while the oven cooled down. Anyway, he lost it said he was tired of this bs, bla bla, just while we were coming out of my room to do dishes. We thought it was a domestic dispute so after he slammed the door to their room I asked if she was ok. Turns out he (who is also in the military so keep that in mind) felt like they were doing all the cleaning in the house, which is false, I had been doing the bathroom once a week, swept on the odd occasion though she generally beat me to it as I work full time and she had different hours than I, and my throwing a pot or pan in the sink to soak before washing it (sometimes leaving until next day but there were other pots and pans that could be used) was TOTALLY the opposite of their 'clean as you go' mentality. Wish I knew that sooner or I'd have cleaned everything before eating all the time lol. Anywho, took their 'system' under consideration and it being 2 v 1 went with it
. She happens to have a history in house cleaning, so you have a military guy where if you leave anything out is considered 'lazy/lack of discipline' and a house cleaning background young woman who says the bathroom needs to be cleaned every 2 days and everything swept.
Sure enough in January up to this date what's happened? They leave trash and dishes out for days and days at a time - double standards hm? Now.. about those ferrets. I'm all for pets, the whole compassionate thing going on there...but we made an agreement that it's their pets, if they doodoo or peepee anywhere it's their responsibilty to take care of it. no big deal. Well.. these ferrets aren't exactly trained the best in terms of litter... This may sound gross but the three of them shiat and piss all over the place in front of the apartment door, between the toilet seat and the tub, behind the toilet seat, behind and under the kitchen table and of course along the doorframe areas to the bedrooms. I'm fine with that, just clean it up. But when you go to open the apartment door all you hear is CRUUUUNCH and you literally see 20 some odd terds with dried pools of pee there, nevermind everywhere else i've mentioned...... it's starting to become a health concern to me! Since I keep my door closed all the time all I hear from time to time is the ferrets scratching at the carpet and door of my room *shivers*, need out lol!
So.. I'm tired of it. The bf doesn't come over often, we literally see each other once bi-weekly or the odd time once a week on the weekend. There's just too much tension in that house and a not-so-happy place it is, so we've agreed to take it easy and focus on our own individual lives a bit more during this time until I move. I left for the weekend and come back to opening the door to the crazy wafting smell of ferrets, to the point I almost vomitted. Sometime's its strong enough in the morning that I am gagging. No jokes, no embellishment, just plain fact. I pretty much live out of my bedroom because when the ferrets are out (they can bite by the way..and draw blood) I do not want them getting in to my room and destroying papers or 'releasing' themselves all over what few belongings I have lol. The heat is weird in the roomates bedroom so when I wake up the thermostat reads anywhere from 25-28 degrees C. It's hotter in my room since there's no circulation of air since the door is closed all the time - Their computers are in the living room and that's their hang out spot, so really, I feel the bedroom is the only place to live when at home hah. It seriously is having an impact on my relationship, and that's not good ju-ju.
Though I am getting the room EXTREMELY cheap I've been slowly saving money, been patient and biting my tongue as I am grateful for what they provided me during my time of need. But lil Raffi needs her own space that is conducive to personal growth, peace and not having to worry about sound levels since there's always someone in the next room.
Tomorrow afternoon I have a potential landlord/place I am going to see. I am hoping to throw in as much charm as possible to get this place seeing as it's not 10 blocks away from where I currently live (easier move and close to the bus/trains i need to get to work), and it's extremely cheap with in-suite laundry!!! Sure it's a basement suite, but it's all stepping stones.
I've found myself EXTREMELY goal orientated having come from rock-bottom during the summer so here's
'THE LIST'
1. Was to get set up in a room mate situation - achieved2. Get out of debt (was paying a debt off for 3 years, that final payment came Nov/Dec) - FINALLY 3 years later I am debt free! - achieved
3. Establish savings again - achieved, cept it's all going towards a new place come May 1st or June 1st when I have a comfortable amount4. Obtain said place - must be close to appropriate public transportation AND have in-suite laundry... Tired of getting clothes ruined by the guy before me who threw his grease monkey clothes in lol. Hey, I'm not being a princess, I just think I deserve to have that added luxury 5. Furnish place ... will take months but one piece at a time right?
6. Fix credit 
7. Driver's ed. - always lived close to work, somehow never got to doing that....That needs to change! Tomorrow I'm taking a look at the place - the landlord was looking to get someone in asap though I've mentioned May 1st as my possession date. He's been screwed over by the previous tenant so he mentioned he'd rather get the 'right' tenant. so here's to hoping I rock some socks off
Seeing as he called me around 9 something last night, i spent a few hours going over personal budget and ikea and misc websites thinking of furniture...which kept me up all night..lol... STILL woke up earlier than alarm though..it's weird! YAY MC
Thaaat's my rant and rave <3 hope all is well for everyone!
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I've done MC or attempted MC numerous times...the longest I lasted was 10 days (first time) I'm gonna try for 10 days again. I almost quit on day 3 (today) but I just kept drinking my LA and telling myself "It's always hard the first few days" Plus, I'm starting a new job on Monday. I don't want to feel like a big fat slob 
Everything in the store looked so good. Well, I have to remember that I already lost 5.2 1bs in 2 days, I started at 205 lbs 
I hope I can handle the smell of the food and not give in....Ahhh, the life of a wife and mother, fun stuff 
(no really, I do) Now with an equipped gym in hand, SINGLE and plenty of time on my hands - Failure is not an option.... Besides...summer is here, and we only get that for 3-4 months out of the year, time to show some skin!