It’s 2am and yeah, maybe I’m just kidding myself and having another hopeful fantasy moment. Here’s the skinny though: I have a bottle of maple syrup on my desk, and damn it, maple syrup DOES expire!! *shakes fist* That shit is expensive and I didn’t buy it last month to just leave it there.
So I want to use it up one way or another... that’s a lie. I want to use it up one way only: doing a damn effective cleanse
The good news is I still have some of the TEA left from this time last year (it doesn’t expire for another year, wooo!), I have sea salt, and I even have lemons (enough to get me through day 1, anyway).
So this is the plan of action: I wake up tomorrow (around 12pm, let’s say... a girl can dream, but...) and I do my SWF (already refrigerated the quantity of water to help me). Whilst I’m waiting for those unpleasant effects to kick in, I’ll do my chores (dish washing, dog walking, etc etc).
I have my tea sitting next to me waiting to be drunk. And today when I was eating, I just felt sick of food. Well, I felt sick in general (moan moan moan) but whatever. So I plan to give myself a break from the tedious process of EATING (oh my god... what has this place done to me?!
) and just drink lemonade for the next ten days, twenty if we’re lucky.
I’ve identified my usual point of failure: somewhere between 3 and 6pm when especially edible food tends to make its presence known (seeing as I do like to wander the kitchen when I’m doing a detox) and this always coincides with me not having drank enough of the lemonade. Usually I’ve only managed 2 out of the 8 glasses I should have drank by then.
(What, it tastes like crap, what do you want me to do!!! Lol)
So tomorrow I’ll be getting down at least 4 lemonades before this point and drinking water whenever I get the urge to eat.
This time I get the fun of having a boyfriend whilst I’m going through this process! This time last year I did not have a boyfriend who would worry about me during the cleanse. I decided I won’t be telling him when I’m actually doing the cleanse until I’m past day 4, because I think he would worry. Although I’m sure he’ll be happy with the end result seeing as how I’m all, like, FAT right now!
A few things to note:
1) I never had a breakout when I’m cleansing but you never know when it could happen.
2) I’m expecting my period around day 4 (crankiness overload today, sorry for over sharing), which is the same that happened last year but I’m not worried about that.
3) On day 2 I get a bad case of the dizzies and sometimes pass out so I’ll keep activity levels low then.
4) I may very quickly run out of money to fund this (granted it is cheaper than eating normally but I can’t afford that either, most of the time) which will mean my detox ending with a resounding “Oh, SHIT” and then me stuffing my face with something... cheesecakey. Reeally not a good idea and could potentially put me in hospital so I’m going to have to keep reminding myself, over and over, that any solid food past day 3 is dangerous.
5) If I decide to break early, someone please remind me to do it with liquids before I eat any solid food so as not to upset my body.
Alright, long rant over now. Check back in tomorrow (better fucking do it!! *angry*)
Aaaaand goodnight!
Login
Register
FAQ
Search
My main motivation is going home, stepping on the scale, and seeing the number get lower and lower...just power through it. Good luck with your cleanse and keep us all updated!