Shiva's Blessed Fasting Journal

shivabliss · **Posted:** Fri May 23, 2008 8:03 pm

Sometimes we just really need an enema.

shivabliss · **Posted:** Fri May 23, 2008 8:17 pm

We are like a giant prehistoric creature rising up from a primordial state, it has become aware, stretching itself to realize it's destiny lies in a higher consciousness.

Fasting always wakes me up to magnificent new ideas. It always completely transforms me. I feel like this past year on MC has changed me from a dinosaur in a primordial state to one who woke up and realized my survival depends on my evolution of my consciousness to a higher state.

After the fast our eyes are more open. We can see our self.

dleelee · **Joined:** Thu May 15, 2008 7:08 pm **Posts:** 246

Shiva, I have been the same, freeeeezing. I also have this thing that when I do the SWF, almost nothing, but everytime I consume some LA, I need to go instantly. It's almost like it gets my bowels going....strange!

I'm so glad you're enjoying your new figure.

That's fabulous.

I wish I could say the same. I measured today and I'm a whole 1cm smaller......that is NOT much, considering how many kilograms have come off. I'm 10lb down, but only 0.39inches!!!!! It's a little disheartening, especially to know that it will all return.

I can't seem to win.

Sorry to be negative. I know this isn't about the weightloss....I think I'm due for my period.

That is a good thing though.

Deb
x

shivabliss · **Posted:** Sat May 24, 2008 6:17 am

Some of us get so out of control with our diets that we destroy ourselves, sadly. Fasting offers us a realistic self check, and offers us a way to see clearly outside of ourselves. Offering a reference point to our blindness. So we can stop and use the time out created by the fast to take a good look at our compulsive behaviors that create imbalance for us.

Mine are- fast foods. No real food relationship, eat what ever, when ever- always for pleasure, which means way too much sugar.

When we go through life with no real reference point, it's like traveling at night on a train with the curtains drawn. You can't tell where you are or how fast you are going. You keep going further and further and you begin to lose control.

shivabliss · **Posted:** Sat May 24, 2008 7:34 am

Fasting takes you from being a helpless victim of fate to the possiblility of controlling your life.

I think many of us have become disenchanted and are mentally walking away from our old lives. Life will force us to stay and play the game, but if we truly wish to progress in this magnificent process of life, we must develop our heart and our spirit. No better way to do this than to fast now and again. The fasting process changes me, it makes me become more aware, and stretching muscles, opening my eyes, so that I can "see" myself.

shivabliss · **Posted:** Sat May 24, 2008 8:14 pm

When things start to go deep on the cleanse, we often encounter fear and that is when we say, "This path is not for me." When it comes to the fast, most of us simply want to avoid the reality of suffering and we cook up all kinds of strategies to get around it. This is when many of us just give up. We would rather fantasize the about the realms of a perfect body, or a healed health opportunity, but we don't want to experience the raw nature of the fasting experience. We give up too soon. This is when we need to go back to square one. Instead of fantasizing about a way out of your cleanse, away from your cleansing goals, go back to square one. We need to look directly into the nature of our experience, to look within, and by doing so awaken from the illusions that entrap us. But how do we walk this path of fear? This fast that seems so scary to us? Fear is not a trivial matter. In many ways, it restricts our lives; it imprisons us. Fear is also a tool of oppression. Because of fear we do many harmful things, mostly to ourselves!

shivabliss · **Posted:** Sat May 24, 2008 8:24 pm

If you linger in the thought that is holding you back from your potential, you will remain mired in fear and frozen in inaction.

shivabliss · **Posted:** Sat May 24, 2008 8:30 pm

The cave of the blue dragon is ominous
Only the fearless dare to enter
It is here that the forest of patterns is clearly revealed
It is here that one ripe pearl is hidden
The cave of the blue dragon is where we store all of our stuff, our psychological bilge, so to speak and it's very difficult to go there. It takes a certain degree of fearlessness to do that. The process of fasting will require that you do that. Your fears will come up, to empower your fearlessness. When your "stuff" comes up, don't just suppress it. This is a signal you need to deal with it. Wen some fear is signaling you to quit your fast, this is a sign you need to deal with what is going on. You need to process it. You need to process it thoroughly and fearlessly, to feel it and experience it, then let it go and come back to the moment. Come back to the moment and breathe! Stay on your fasts!

shivabliss · **Posted:** Sun May 25, 2008 4:09 am

It is said that out of ignornace we fear what we should not fear, and we are not afraid of what we should be afraid of.

dleelee · **Joined:** Thu May 15, 2008 7:08 pm **Posts:** 246

Thank you for sharing Shiva.

My problem is not with food, it's with pain killers. I have constant pain,....sorry, HAD constant pain! Endometriosis, bad back pain, headaches etc. If I went one day without a painkiller it was good. I only take one or two a day, but I can't go without them! It's a terrible cycle. I feel awful about it. I've been 14 days without ONE painkiller.

I've been eating very well since my son was born 18months ago, as he forced me.

I believe he came to help me with my diet. He has food allergies and I cut the same foods so I could feed him. I lost 66lbs in around 6months...the weight literally FELL off! My body was so happy.

Now I started gaining a few months back and despite my healthy diet, it was just getting worse. I lost two pregnancy's and the constant pain was debilitating. A downward spiral. I needed this to take stock of my health. Being pain free has certainly been the most amazing part of this for me. I'd love to shed this weight just because I'm so nervous of it returning and not being able to lose it again! I hate being focused on losing weight. When I initally dropped it all, I never thought about weight, never weighed myself, just ate as I needed. It was freedom. I want that again.

x
Deb

shivabliss · **Posted:** Mon May 26, 2008 10:14 am

shivabliss · **Posted:** Mon May 26, 2008 10:25 am

shivabliss · **Posted:** Mon May 26, 2008 10:35 am

One of the strongest lessons I have ever had to learn, is about my own ignorance about where happiness really lies for me. There seems to be a quality in us that is committed to keeping us unhappy. We have the intention to be happy and yet we do things that make us suffer.

MC frees us of the karmic results from doing the same habitual thing over and over again, in order to encourage us to interrupt those habits and in fact burn them up altogether. When we hang in there on our fasts, we save ourselves from dire consequences.

What if you could find the keys to your innermost self?

Knock down a few walls? In order to stay on the fast you will need to be interested in reflecting on yourself, and also willing not to bail out. It requires devotion to a process you stick with through thick and thin, where you will be required to love yourself so much that you can withstand strong challenges. We can appreciate difficult circumstances that we face, because they can transform us. Having an appreciation towards that which causes us difficulty, leads to freedom. We become grateful that we are no longer oppressed by our minds and the unpredictable mess we have been trapped in.

Each day on the fast, I discover there are not so many story lines going on inside me. In fact, I think I have a top ten. You don't have to be a brilliant person to know that the habitual response never brings you the happiness you seek. Burrough's outlined the path for us, but now it is entirely up to each one of us to walk the path. If we are not able to cultivate actions that will support our intention, we will not make much progress. This is why so many of us fail once we start our program. Many of us have no idea how to go about doing this by yourself. Don't worry! On MC, one's own experience is the teaching. Your own process is the real teacher, and as your ability to do this work grows you will develop confidence in that. The teaching of MC is not just found in books, but in the doing. We must marry our intentions with specific actions.

shivabliss · **Posted:** Mon May 26, 2008 11:40 am

Many of us do not realize that it is our own thinking that is keeping us from having a successful fast. Your fast can help you break an addiction, and overcome the rut you have been stuck in for years with your diet and your health. But too often people don't even attempt day one of a fast because of wrong mind sets. They think, "I could never do Master Cleanser, I would starve to death. I like eating too much. You don't know all the special problems I have. I will never lose this weight. This is the way it's always going to be. It's all down hill from here!"

Our software is contaminated. You have to examine your thought life. What are you thinking about? Have you allowed strong holds to convince you that this is as good as it is going to get and you are never going to go any further in your life? Do you think you will never get well because you have had your sickness for years? I will never get rid of these problems, I am just going to have to learn to live with them? Recognize that those are wrong mind sets that are keeping you from rising higher. Just like a virus can contaminate a computer, a stronghold can contaminate our thinking!

shivabliss · **Posted:** Mon May 26, 2008 8:52 pm

The hardest part of fasting is making room for it in our thinking.

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