The Power Rangers, Ninjas and Navy Seals, and Flying Monkeys all showed up here to get me to quit my Master Cleanse. I fought them off. I even had to fight off Frosty the Freakin' Snowman who tried to freeze me to death. I beat him with a huge coat and a little beanie hat. Melting Melting!
It's Day 34.
My tongue is pinker but not pink. Patience my pretties, patience.
I had a rope worm exit on Day 29, a big one. 18 inches. And buckets of mucus. It's pretty crazy.
I bought this pair of pants at the thrift store maybe 2 weeks back that were so so tight I couldn't get them to button and now they fit. So size is leaving me, but not necessarily weight. I stopped weighing myself cause weighing yourself is hella-annoying in all ways. My sternum feels really odd, like it isn't enjoying the shrinking process. I look very different than I did 34 days ago.
I've been able to go to the gym and do my daily stuff ... it's all good. If I get detox-y, I stop and lay down and read or watch Netflix til it passes. It can literally pass in an hour now. A couple of quotes float in my head, one is, "No matter what on the Master Cleanse, Do Not Eat." The other is about haters, a woman writes about how she was working in a restaurant and told the bartender she was doing the Master Cleanse and his reply was, "If you wanna lose weight, you should just come over to my apartment and we can spend a weekend smoking Crystal Meth." Jessie, is that you?
Days 20-30 soundly kicked my ass. I mean it felt like I was run over by a fully charged Prius. So much joint pain, so much emotional detox. This cleanse has been the most amount of emo detox I have ever experienced. First it was grief. Now it's all about getting flashbacks and accepting things as the are. As. They. Are. Not edited or made pretty. It's interesting.
In closing a rather hilarious combo of Vogue magazine does the Master Cleanse that gave me the laff big time! I love how deeply out of touch Vogue still is. It's charming.
http://www.vogue.com/865349/mr-clean-je ... -the-test/