Day 4 of 60 (194.0)
Day 4 was a very lazy Sunday. It was the only day this week that I didn't have to set an alarm and I was genuinely grateful for the additional sleep. I woke up with significant mucus and had to blow my nose at least four times before I stopped sounding nasal. I assume this has something to do with the cleanse as it is not something I generally experience. I will confess that I haven't finished reading Stanley Burrows' book, but I will move it up on my "to do" list as I would really like to understand the changes my body may experience during the cleanse. I have yet to have any of the dramatic, photo-worthy bowel movements that others seem to have, however, I have been a lactose intolerant vegetarian for ten years, so perhaps carbs just aren't as interesting?
I was greeted by 194.0 lbs this morning when I stepped on the scale which is a 1.4 loss since yesterday. While I like seeing the scale move, most of my goals on the cleanse is are health and habit related...
I over did it during my walk on Friday night; my feet still hurt a bit yesterday and when I woke up this morning so my Sunday rest day was very timely. In the future, I will be a bit more conscious about overexerting myself. I need to remember that this is a not a sprint and that changes to my body, including endurance, will take time. However, something that I have been paying better attention to is my hunger. I notice that unlike when I am not doing the cleanse, where I eat mindlessly for reasons and desires other than hunger, the MC lemonade is so boring that I only reach for it when I am hungry. When I am hungry, I drink a bit, and then drink a bit more, and I keep drinking until I am full but never to the point that I feel like my stomach is awash in fluid or that I need to burp to be comfortable. I also don't deny myself lemonade. If I am up working at 11 o'clock at night and I get hungry, I drink a serving of lemonade. I don't restrict myself based on home many servings I have already had that day. I think acknowledging that I was participating in a constant cycle of restriction and then binging is important. I don't want this behavior to continue.
I spent much of the morning watching Netflix videos and chatting with Mr. Canada (my many thanks to bookw0rm for the pseudonym). Thankfully, today he was eating leftovers and did not feel the need to send me photos of his homemade food. I just wrapped up some homework and after I finish writing this post, I shall retire to bed. But before I do that...
If I could only recommend one thing to anyone on this journey, it would be that you find support. I have found support in the MC forum (not linking to prevent bots). The people on the forum are so supportive and their own efforts force me to continually challenge and better myself. Today's personal challenges...
1) Be kind to yourself. Forgive yourself. Allow yourself to be human. Learn to let go of perceived past shortcomings and failures. In this spirit, I would like to acknowledge that this is not my first MC. I did one several years ago, and it was largely a success, however, I did allow a "friend" who knew about it to ultimately talk me out of finishing it. A link to that partial journey can be found here:
viewtopic.php?f=11&t=13717&start=15 Again, my many thanks to bookw0rm for inspiring me today.
2) Abbey Lee mentioned that she thought my goal weight will suit my body. I think it will and after some rummaging around, I was able to find a non-public photo of myself in that weight range. I think I was initially too embarrassed to post this because it shows how low my current low is, but in consideration of today's first challenge, I'm going to post it. (Photo posted on blog - This photo is probably a couple of pounds above my current goal...forgive the shoes scattered in the background...and the shoes I'm wearing.)
I'm sorry that wasn't as organized or as eloquent as it could have been. Tomorrow I shall do better.