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 Post subject: MCMakeover's 60 Day Journey
PostPosted: Sat Feb 18, 2017 8:08 pm 
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Posts: 49
Who am I?

I am a 31 year old graduate student who, like many, is tired of being fat.

Unlike a lot of folks, I can't say that fat crept up on me. That fat happened slowly over time. That fat went unnoticed. It wasn't that I didn't notice that I was gaining weight...a lot of weight...at unprecedented speeds, it was that I didn't care. I was depressed, lost, and a bit lonely, and food...really good food...provided me with comfort and distraction. But as anyone who has every struggled with an addiction could tell you, the respite is only temporary. The euphoria that immediately came from consuming well aged cheese or wine dissipated with an empty plate. Over time, it took larger and larger quantities of food to produce the same experience of satiation as the weight piled on and my depression grew.

Like many, I became adept at hiding my ballooning figure under well chosen scarfs, shawls, and cardigans. But eventually, I would catch a glimpse of my fully naked figure before entering or exiting the shower and all of my shame and sadness seemed to be there in the stretch marks, lumps, and rolls that marred my once relatively smooth skin.

Today, I'm tired of being fat. And I'm tired of being tired of being fat. So I have set out to do something about it and the underlying reasons that drove me to eat in the first place.

60 days from now I hope to be in a better place both physically and mentally. This blog* will serve as an outlet and a record of my journey. Stay tuned.




*The post on this site and my blog (which was created solely for the cleanse and will end once the cleanse is completed) will largely be similar, except my blog will contain photos from my journey. If you would like to see photos, venture on over there. But fair warning, it's not pretty.

http://mastercleansemakeover.blogspot.com/


Last edited by MCMakeover on Sat Feb 18, 2017 8:12 pm, edited 4 times in total.

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 Post subject: Day 1 of 60 (199.4 lbs)
PostPosted: Sat Feb 18, 2017 8:09 pm 
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Day 1 of 60 (199.4 lbs)

I woke up this morning tired and excited to start this journey to better health. I was also terrified to step on the scale...but I did. The number that stared back at me wasn't terribly shocking and I can admit that there was a small part of me that was incredibly grateful I wasn't forced to face a number that began with a terrible 2...

At 5'5, I am 199.4 lbs. This is, without a doubt, the heaviest I have ever been in my life. While, ultimately, I am going to allow my body and this journey to dictate my final weight, the ideal weight range I have for myself is between 147-151 lbs. In the past my weight has rested comfortably there with "normal" eating an moderate exercise. So my rough "goal" for this cleanse and beyond is to release 50lbs.

The second decision I had to make was whether or not to take photos or "body shots". Ultimately, I want my blog to be a blog I would like to read so I have decided to take four photos. Every ten days, I will retake these same four photos so that there is another way to visualize this journey.


Last edited by MCMakeover on Sat Feb 18, 2017 8:13 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Day 2 of 60 (196.6)
PostPosted: Sat Feb 18, 2017 8:10 pm 
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Day 2 of 60 (196.6)

Ahhhh Day 2. This is usually a hard day for me on any journey (losing weight, attempting to floss everyday, etc.) but I think the sheer horror of the number I saw on the scale yesterday carried me into today. I woke up this morning, did my bathroom business, and hopped on the scale to see 196.6...which is 2.8 lbs loss since yesterday. Now, yes, I know that most, if not all, of this loss is water weight. Ir doesn't matter. It's movement in the right direction and its motivation for me to get through the day.

While most of my day was generally uneventful, I was quite hungry when I woke up this morning and was in quite a hurry to make my first batch of lemonade for the day. I had squeezed my lemons and poured my maple syrup when I reached for the red stuff and the wrong end opened a clump of red powder colored my drink. I was so hungry that I shrugged, screwed the cap onto my bottle, shook it up, and prepared myself for a very spicy drink. I was quite surprised when it wasn't spicy at all. Had I grown immune to the seasoning so soon? It was then that I looked at the label of the herb and noticed that what I had added to my drink was not cayenne pepper but paprika! While I was embarrassed I hadn't paid closer attention to the herbs as to have avoided making the mistake in the first place, I was not unhappy that I hadn't added accidentally added a tablespoon of cayenne pepper to my lemonade and rendered it undrinkable. As it was, I just added the appropriate amount of cayenne and kept it moving.

Day 2 ended with a long walk...almost seven miles...and two servings of lemonade before I typed out this post and climbed into bed.


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 Post subject: Day 3 of 60 (195.4)
PostPosted: Sat Feb 18, 2017 8:15 pm 
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Day 3 of 60 (195.4)

Largely uneventful day. I was excited to step on the scale this morning and see that I had released/lost/reduced/whatever another 1.2 lbs.

I have been very very very casually seeing this guy (because he lives in Canada...more on that later) for several months and today, while we were video chatting, he decides to start cooking. Ugh. I had been fine all day. No cravings. No temptation to eat anything other than my spicy lemonade and then he started cooking gourmet food right in front of me. He doesn't know about my current journey. As a scientist, he wouldn't approve. As a man who loves food, he wouldn't approve. As someone who cares about me, he wouldn't approve. ...so I'm not going to tell him. Yea...more on that later.


***This thread/journal is now in sync with my blog. I had planned to start them both at the same time (three days ago) but there is a lag for administrative approval on this site. New post on this site will be similar to what is on my blog except without photos.***


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 Post subject: Re: MCMakeover's 60 Day Journey
PostPosted: Sun Feb 19, 2017 4:35 am 
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Joined: Tue May 17, 2016 4:49 pm
Posts: 261
Yay! I'm so happy you found the Master Cleanse! My highest weight in my adult life was 191 and I'm 5'7" and I know the horror of seeing your body cave to depression and bad food. I know all too well. You are doing great and it's wonderful that you are helping yourself out like this. I had to laugh at the paprika lemonade!

You will feel so much better!

As to not telling people, yeah that is an excellent choice. I don't tell people what I am up to. They seriously can't handle it. People are brainwashed these days to think that food is some kind of curative fix-all and it just isn't true. Often no-food and digestion switched to the off position is best.

I'm on Day 26. You can do it! You are doing it! Well wishes Friend!


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 Post subject: Re: MCMakeover's 60 Day Journey
PostPosted: Sun Feb 19, 2017 5:39 am 
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Posts: 49
Abbey Lee wrote:
Yay! I'm so happy you found the Master Cleanse! My highest weight in my adult life was 191 and I'm 5'7" and I know the horror of seeing your body cave to depression and bad food. I know all too well. You are doing great and it's wonderful that you are helping yourself out like this. I had to laugh at the paprika lemonade!

You will feel so much better!

As to not telling people, yeah that is an excellent choice. I don't tell people what I am up to. They seriously can't handle it. People are brainwashed these days to think that food is some kind of curative fix-all and it just isn't true. Often no-food and digestion switched to the off position is best.

I'm on Day 26. You can do it! You are doing it! Well wishes Friend!


Hello Abbey! *waves*

What a lovely response. Thank you for you for your positive attitude and support. In a single post, you made me feel less lonely.

The paprika lemonade...yea. Shockingly, it didn't taste that bad. Just slightly...off. The only reason I knew something was up was because almost a tablespoon of it fell into my lemonade and had it been cayenne pepper, there would have been no way I wouldn't have been able to taste it and I probably wouldn't have been able to drink it.

Your correct about not telling people...which is why I am here. Forums have always been a great source of information and support for me. Having a community of like minded people has always helped me to achieve my goals even when they initially look crazy to outsiders.

I'm excited to hear you are on Day 26! Hopefully you have a journal as I am not off to search for it.


Last edited by MCMakeover on Sun Feb 19, 2017 10:27 am, edited 2 times in total.

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 Post subject: Re: MCMakeover's 60 Day Journey
PostPosted: Sun Feb 19, 2017 9:38 am 
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Joined: Sat Apr 02, 2016 1:47 pm
Posts: 155
MCMakeover wrote:
Who am I?

I am a 31 year old graduate student who, like many, is tired of being fat.

Unlike a lot of folks, I can't say that fat crept up on me. That fat happened slowly over time. That fat went unnoticed. It wasn't that I didn't notice that I was gaining weight...a lot of weight...at unprecedented speeds, it was that I didn't care. I was depressed, lost, and a bit lonely, and food...really good food...provided me with comfort and distraction. But as anyone who has every struggled with an addiction could tell you, the respite is only temporary. The euphoria that immediately came from consuming well aged cheese or wine dissipated with an empty plate. Over time, it took larger and larger quantities of food to produce the same experience of satiation as the weight piled on and my depression grew.

Like many, I became adept at hiding my ballooning figure under well chosen scarfs, shawls, and cardigans. But eventually, I would catch a glimpse of my fully naked figure before entering or exiting the shower and all of my shame and sadness seemed to be there in the stretch marks, lumps, and rolls that marred my once relatively smooth skin.

Today, I'm tired of being fat. And I'm tired of being tired of being fat. So I have set out to do something about it and the underlying reasons that drove me to eat in the first place.

60 days from now I hope to be in a better place both physically and mentally. This blog* will serve as an outlet and a record of my journey. Stay tuned.




*The post on this site and my blog (which was created solely for the cleanse and will end once the cleanse is completed) will largely be similar, except my blog will contain photos from my journey. If you would like to see photos, venture on over there. But fair warning, it's not pretty.

http://mastercleansemakeover.blogspot.com/


I so very much identify with your post because I'm close in weight and age range to you. I've been steadily gaining weight the last 10 yrs and have learned how to hide behind my clothes too lol. Living in cold cold Canada makes it a lot easier.

I did peek over at your blog and I applaud your openness to share yourself. I look forward to reading about your journey...highs, lows, successes. :D

It is hard for people to understand or accept that "fasting" can lead to better health. I've been doing the mc since 2008 and by now most my friends and family just accept it and try to cheer me on in this journey. There *are* some people I would never tell because I don't want to feel discouraged. Deciding to start this journey is tough mentally and does require strong will power and sometimes that small word of discouragement can make the difference between how successful my fasting is. So not telling people is sometimes better so you can keep focused on your ultimate goal.

Wishing us both success in this. :mrgreen:


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 Post subject: Re: MCMakeover's 60 Day Journey
PostPosted: Sun Feb 19, 2017 10:37 am 
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Posts: 49
bookw0rm wrote:

I so very much identify with your post because I'm close in weight and age range to you. I've been steadily gaining weight the last 10 yrs and have learned how to hide behind my clothes too lol. Living in cold cold Canada makes it a lot easier.

I did peek over at your blog and I applaud your openness to share yourself. I look forward to reading about your journey...highs, lows, successes. :D

It is hard for people to understand or accept that "fasting" can lead to better health. I've been doing the mc since 2008 and by now most my friends and family just accept it and try to cheer me on in this journey. There *are* some people I would never tell because I don't want to feel discouraged. Deciding to start this journey is tough mentally and does require strong will power and sometimes that small word of discouragement can make the difference between how successful my fasting is. So not telling people is sometimes better so you can keep focused on your ultimate goal.

Wishing us both success in this. :mrgreen:


Awe, thank you so much for connecting! And for not barfing when you saw my "before" pictures...or at least not telling me about it :oops:

We have a lot in common... I was a senior in college back in 2008 and I first stumbled across the Master Cleanse when I was panicking about seeing my parents (read: vain but lovable mother) at graduation.

You're exactly right about the clothing benefits of colder climates...I am originally from upstate NY and currently living in another state that borders Canada, and the cold climate means that no one ever really questions why my boots, scarves, and shawls seem to come out earlier and earlier each year. The scientist...who will no doubt come up in later post...at least on my blog...also lives in Canada.

You're also right about not telling specific people...while there are some people that I could tell (like a friend who is a body builder and fast during "cuts") there are other people like my best friend who would never be supportive and try to make me feel bad about myself for doing it...even though she is seriously overweight and equally unhappy. I am so glad to have this forum.

I hope you have a journal/blog as I am off to search for it. If not, I hope we continue to connect and I genuinely appreciate you for reaching out. I think a bit of what makes this journey so mentally tough is that it can be lonely.

-CM


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 Post subject: Re: MCMakeover's 60 Day Journey
PostPosted: Sun Feb 19, 2017 4:21 pm 
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Joined: Sat Apr 02, 2016 1:47 pm
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MCMakeover wrote:
bookw0rm wrote:

I so very much identify with your post because I'm close in weight and age range to you. I've been steadily gaining weight the last 10 yrs and have learned how to hide behind my clothes too lol. Living in cold cold Canada makes it a lot easier.

I did peek over at your blog and I applaud your openness to share yourself. I look forward to reading about your journey...highs, lows, successes. :D

It is hard for people to understand or accept that "fasting" can lead to better health. I've been doing the mc since 2008 and by now most my friends and family just accept it and try to cheer me on in this journey. There *are* some people I would never tell because I don't want to feel discouraged. Deciding to start this journey is tough mentally and does require strong will power and sometimes that small word of discouragement can make the difference between how successful my fasting is. So not telling people is sometimes better so you can keep focused on your ultimate goal.

Wishing us both success in this. :mrgreen:


Awe, thank you so much for connecting! And for not barfing when you saw my "before" pictures...or at least not telling me about it :oops:

We have a lot in common... I was a senior in college back in 2008 and I first stumbled across the Master Cleanse when I was panicking about seeing my parents (read: vain but lovable mother) at graduation.

You're exactly right about the clothing benefits of colder climates...I am originally from upstate NY and currently living in another state that borders Canada, and the cold climate means that no one ever really questions why my boots, scarves, and shawls seem to come out earlier and earlier each year. The scientist...who will no doubt come up in later post...at least on my blog...also lives in Canada.

You're also right about not telling specific people...while there are some people that I could tell (like a friend who is a body builder and fast during "cuts") there are other people like my best friend who would never be supportive and try to make me feel bad about myself for doing it...even though she is seriously overweight and equally unhappy. I am so glad to have this forum.

I hope you have a journal/blog as I am off to search for it. If not, I hope we continue to connect and I genuinely appreciate you for reaching out. I think a bit of what makes this journey so mentally tough is that it can be lonely.

-CM

Me barf? Ha! I am definitely in no position to judge appearances especially when I am rather rotund :lol:

This journey can definitely be lonely so I am glad I have this place as an outlet and bonus is lovely ladies such as yourself cheering me on. :D

ps - I am looking forward to hearing more about Mr Canada... :wink:


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 Post subject: Day 4 of 60 (194.0)
PostPosted: Sun Feb 19, 2017 8:49 pm 
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Day 4 of 60 (194.0)

Day 4 was a very lazy Sunday. It was the only day this week that I didn't have to set an alarm and I was genuinely grateful for the additional sleep. I woke up with significant mucus and had to blow my nose at least four times before I stopped sounding nasal. I assume this has something to do with the cleanse as it is not something I generally experience. I will confess that I haven't finished reading Stanley Burrows' book, but I will move it up on my "to do" list as I would really like to understand the changes my body may experience during the cleanse. I have yet to have any of the dramatic, photo-worthy bowel movements that others seem to have, however, I have been a lactose intolerant vegetarian for ten years, so perhaps carbs just aren't as interesting?

I was greeted by 194.0 lbs this morning when I stepped on the scale which is a 1.4 loss since yesterday. While I like seeing the scale move, most of my goals on the cleanse is are health and habit related...

I over did it during my walk on Friday night; my feet still hurt a bit yesterday and when I woke up this morning so my Sunday rest day was very timely. In the future, I will be a bit more conscious about overexerting myself. I need to remember that this is a not a sprint and that changes to my body, including endurance, will take time. However, something that I have been paying better attention to is my hunger. I notice that unlike when I am not doing the cleanse, where I eat mindlessly for reasons and desires other than hunger, the MC lemonade is so boring that I only reach for it when I am hungry. When I am hungry, I drink a bit, and then drink a bit more, and I keep drinking until I am full but never to the point that I feel like my stomach is awash in fluid or that I need to burp to be comfortable. I also don't deny myself lemonade. If I am up working at 11 o'clock at night and I get hungry, I drink a serving of lemonade. I don't restrict myself based on home many servings I have already had that day. I think acknowledging that I was participating in a constant cycle of restriction and then binging is important. I don't want this behavior to continue.

I spent much of the morning watching Netflix videos and chatting with Mr. Canada (my many thanks to bookw0rm for the pseudonym). Thankfully, today he was eating leftovers and did not feel the need to send me photos of his homemade food. I just wrapped up some homework and after I finish writing this post, I shall retire to bed. But before I do that...

If I could only recommend one thing to anyone on this journey, it would be that you find support. I have found support in the MC forum (not linking to prevent bots). The people on the forum are so supportive and their own efforts force me to continually challenge and better myself. Today's personal challenges...

1) Be kind to yourself. Forgive yourself. Allow yourself to be human. Learn to let go of perceived past shortcomings and failures. In this spirit, I would like to acknowledge that this is not my first MC. I did one several years ago, and it was largely a success, however, I did allow a "friend" who knew about it to ultimately talk me out of finishing it. A link to that partial journey can be found here: viewtopic.php?f=11&t=13717&start=15 Again, my many thanks to bookw0rm for inspiring me today.

2) Abbey Lee mentioned that she thought my goal weight will suit my body. I think it will and after some rummaging around, I was able to find a non-public photo of myself in that weight range. I think I was initially too embarrassed to post this because it shows how low my current low is, but in consideration of today's first challenge, I'm going to post it. (Photo posted on blog - This photo is probably a couple of pounds above my current goal...forgive the shoes scattered in the background...and the shoes I'm wearing.)

I'm sorry that wasn't as organized or as eloquent as it could have been. Tomorrow I shall do better.


Last edited by MCMakeover on Thu Feb 23, 2017 3:44 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Re: MCMakeover's 60 Day Journey
PostPosted: Mon Feb 20, 2017 7:25 am 
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Posts: 58
Congrats on your 1.4 lb weight loss, anything that isn't a gain is worth celebrating. You made it to Day 4 so I know you can do this!! This site will definitely help to push you up the hill to victory!


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 Post subject: Re: MCMakeover's 60 Day Journey
PostPosted: Mon Feb 20, 2017 9:43 am 
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sldeal wrote:
Congrats on your 1.4 lb weight loss, anything that isn't a gain is worth celebrating. You made it to Day 4 so I know you can do this!! This site will definitely help to push you up the hill to victory!


Thanks for the support! I plan to just take it day by day. As a graduating, graduate student there is a lot of influx in my life at the moment that is causing stress, surprisingly, the MC is not one of them. So I hope to truck right on along to day 60.


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 Post subject: Day 5 of 60 (192.8)
PostPosted: Mon Feb 20, 2017 5:06 pm 
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Day 5 of 60 (192.8 )

Today was a shitty day. And it had nothing to do with the cleanse itself but the underlying reasons for it. Today was a shitty day. Tomorrow can only be better.



*I am still on the cleanse. It's day five and the scale showed 192.8 lbs this morning which is a 1.2 loss since yesterday.


Last edited by MCMakeover on Thu Feb 23, 2017 3:48 pm, edited 3 times in total.

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 Post subject: Re: MCMakeover's 60 Day Journey
PostPosted: Tue Feb 21, 2017 5:08 pm 
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I hope today was better for ya!


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 Post subject: Day 6 of 60 (191.2)
PostPosted: Tue Feb 21, 2017 5:28 pm 
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Day 6 of 60 (191.2)

Today was a better day.

I was incredibly sad and a bit depressed yesterday. All I wanted to do was climb out or "bounce back" but was forced to conduct a survey of my life and feelings in a way that was incredibly stressful for me. Thus, the short, sad post.

Today was a better day.

I hopped on the scale to be greeted by 191.2 which represents a 1.6lbs loss from yesterday. As always, I am grateful for every pound, half pound, quarter of a pound, and ounce released.

Yesterday, my funk found me walking outside for several hours but unlike last Friday, I did not over do it. When I would feel tired or as if my feet were beginning to hurt, I would take a rest and think. I also realized that I was not drinking enough water and significantly increased the amount of water that I am consuming.

I think yesterday and all the time I had for reflection and thought made me realized how much time we dedicate to thinking about, preparing, consuming. and disposing of food. I mean, I didn't realized how much time I must spend each week just cleaning dishes alone. On the cleanse, I wash my lemonade bottle, my water bottle, knife, tablespoon, and juice strainer and that is it. As long as I run each of these items under hot water after use, the amount of time it takes to wash them is negligible.

Today was a better day. Hopefully, tomorrow will be even better.


Last edited by MCMakeover on Thu Feb 23, 2017 3:46 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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