Shiva's Blessed Fasting Journal

shivabliss · **Posted:** Sun May 18, 2008 4:49 pm

Vision from a dark detoxing night:

Last night was a dark night of fighting the ghouls. That is what I call the toxins. They were bringing me under attack. I was so covered in ghouls that I could hardly make my poor body; I felt all tangled up and deformed as the ghouls that had settled deep within me were being bent out of shape. I could feel MC ploughing in and clearing them out. After many hours of fighting I could feel my strength and I stood up. I still wasn't completely right but much better. I could feel the attacks on my kidneys and the glands in my throat. Eventually all I felt was this heart wrenching sadness. I found myself crying buckets of tears uncontrollably. I was so exhausted, I knew not what else to do. The attack was a ferocious drain on my life force.

As I lay there quiet in my bed soaking in sweat, I began to feel my soul deep within me blowing love to me. It kept blowing ever harder, sending me love, connecting me to my life force. Trying to open me up. I know that I love, but my soul says I do not have enough love. This fast is breaking down the walls, so I can escape free from the ghouls. Love from within can save me. We are not powerless.

Whatever evil is presenting itself to you in your body, MC has the power to untrap you. You are not powerless to get out of your situation. You are capable of great love. Many of us fail on our cleanse because we do not do it with enough love. Let this realization rock you to the core, let it rock you to the next level.

Let your soul blow ever harder to open you up. You are capable of so much more love. The love that saves one from danger. That is what I am doing while on MC, I am loving myself enough to save myself from danger.

I awoke at dawn, craving water. I could feel the battle was over. I had won. This fast is impelling me to seek a new level. I must become more, love more, except more love from others, surrender to love and make it my mantra. Through love you become heaven and earth, and all things are possible. The old me has to die on this cleanse. I am working to improve my sense of worthlessness and develop a sense of honor. Each new day on the cleanse offers a big learning if we can stay open to it. This is a blessing to the fragile state the fast takes us through. The soul of the fast, makes us whole in ways we never realize when we first begin. It is a sacrifice, and yet it is a great blessing.

shivabliss · **Posted:** Mon May 19, 2008 5:59 am

So called objective reality is as fickle as the weather. Maybe that's because it's as much mind as matter. It hardly occurs to most of us that change is mostly in ourselves and not the world around us. We wake up one day and the world is an enchanting place we can't wait to conquer. We wake up the next and we can barely see through the hail and gloom.

Suffering and unhappiness are quite different things. Suffering is the state, the reality we are all given. But unhappiness is the way we choose to respond to it. Those rendered paraplegic often call themselves happy, after a year or so of adjustment, as frequently as those who win the lottery end up in despair.

Almost every day I wake up and look out on the same room, the same desk, the same view from my window; but every day it looks different, colored not just by the light, the temperature, or the time of day, but as
much by the light inside me.

shivabliss · **Posted:** Mon May 19, 2008 10:10 am

When I fast I feel like I am flying on the wings of a great bird. Master Cleanser becomes the wings that hold me in balance against the wafting winds allowing me to float, enjoying my day. It allows me to appreciate the flavor of emptiness. The emptiness created inside me from the fast helps me to get better in touch with my spiritual nature. Some find the emptiness chillingly abstract, even scary. But I always take to the emptiness while fasting. I love feeling lighter than air.

Today is day 12 of MC for me, and I can taste the emptiness in my body, spirit and emotions. All the stuff that makes up my life- my body, my thoughts, my emotions, my perceptions, hopes, desires, actions, words seem less desperate while on the fast, because now I can feel their cloud like nature.

Today that cloud is all I am; it is my freedom to soar and feel my connection to all. I can float in this empty space within, feeling my connection to earth and sky. The fast challenges me to see that nothing is real in the normal way I think it is. Everything in this world is passing and beautiful like falling snow flakes.

When I fast, I rest in emptiness. My breath goes in and out. It is a breath I share with all who have lived and will live. I feel in tune with the great rhythm that began this world of physical reality and will never cease, even when the earth is gone. Fasting helps me to find the zero-point within, the empty space of nothingness where everything including you and me exist.

Nette0309 · **Posted:** Tue May 20, 2008 2:17 pm

Hey Shiva,

I'm thinkin bout quitting my 10th day is tomorrow, just in case

I wanted to know the rule"

Is it for every 3 days on MC you drink OJ for 1 day ?

SLM · **Posted:** Tue May 20, 2008 3:45 pm

Shiva,

Thanks for the kind words. I've been told by people in my life that I am the most disciplined person they know because I've been doing this now for over 20 days.

I always tell them that I failed my first second attempt at the MC.

I'm very glad my thread is helping anyone at all. It helps me a lot just to post and read other's posts but when I read that my rambling has inspired someone else it's all the more sweet.

S.L.M. are my initals. Funny initals for am anything but slim.

shivabliss · **Posted:** Tue May 20, 2008 5:32 pm

Fasting opens a way of being that one can aspire to. Those of us who fast take a vow, one simple commitment: to put the fast first, holding nothing back for ourselves. We put our own well being first, in order to liberate ourselves. We fast out of a strong sense of self preservation. To stay on your fast you will be required to let go of old territory, ego defenses, and take on a greater responsibility. It means taking a big chance.

When we fast we indulge ourselves in self preservation. MC is a very powerful cleanse that is magnificent and glorious for our bodies. Those of you who are tempted to join in might be envious of such wonderful results one gets from our work. But beware, the fast will make tremendous demands on you. It will take you out of your comfort zone, and away from the world outside of you.

A fast can break the chain reaction we get caught up in and creates a way to work outward into an awakened state. It gives us tremendous power to change the course of our karma. When we fast we become the liberator, inspired to work on ourselves. We stop being the instigator of further chaos and misery for ourselves, as we develop a sense of a greater vision. Putting such vision into practice requires that we relate to situations clearly. We have to drop our self centeredness, which clouds our actions, and develop a sense of compassion. The fast teaches us ongoing openness and gentleness.

shivabliss · **Posted:** Tue May 20, 2008 5:47 pm

Many of us come to the cleanse in a stalemate with ourselves. Obviously people have alot of problems and they suffer a great deal. If you are anything like me you suffer because of a lack of discipline, lack of patience, and lack of exertion. But on the cleanse we get a chance to heal and to get in touch with our gentleness. My teacher always told me, that if one has only half a grain of sand's worth of awareness, that we can overcome much of our suffering. When we fast we stay soft in spite of the little inconveniences the fast puts us through. Many of us have such heavy handed neurosis, or ego dirt, I like to call it, that it is hard for us to find the softness the fast requires. Whereby we allow situations to take place in spite of the little inconveniences, like the taste of peppery lemonade, or the SWF, or the fact that you would rather be eating a cheeseburger, instead of the lemonade. We must be mature enough to realize this is a learning process, we will blossom with patience.

When we stay committed to our cleansing goals, we are willing to be the highway, to the destiny we seek. At times we will feel empty, deprived, perhaps even a bit confused. But something comes out of our willingness to stay that way, they become stepping stones. Even the irritations that occur on the fast becomes a way of confirming our commitment.

We offer ourselves as wind, fire, air, earth, and water and away from our natural tendencies towards indulgence on MC. One of our biggest obstacles is taking the whole thing too seriously in a militant fashion. This never works. Beginners are often overly concerned with the details and forget about the joy and light hearted approach needed to do MC. In the beginning you might have to fake being open and joyous. But you should atleast attempt to be cheerful, and at the same time, brave. You may leap like a flea, a grasshopper, a frog, or finally like a bird, but some sort of leap is always taking place on our path.

inspired · **Posted:** Tue May 20, 2008 6:01 pm

Shiva,
Thanks for the reminder about the gums--I'd forgotten about that.

Brushing my teeth more often is tricky. I've heard from a few sources that it's not good to brush your teeth after having fresh lemon. It promotes erosion (or whatever the term is for teeth. I don't know how long it's best to wait before brushing.

Has anyone else heard about this caution?
Thanks

Nette0309 · **Posted:** Wed May 21, 2008 3:17 am

Shiva,

thanks.. and it's good to know that your always here and will more than likely be here when I get back, your a pilar on this board.

Nette0309 · **Posted:** Wed May 21, 2008 4:52 am

SHIVA,

THIS IS WHAT HAVE I LEARNED ON THIS JOURNEY , THOUGHT I SHARE THIS WITH YOU.

1. EATING SHOULD NOT BE A CHORE, I HAVE TO EAT TO LIVE, AND NOT WORRY MYSELF WITH IT.

EAT RIGHT, WORK OUT, LOOSE WEIGHT - BE HEALTHY .... KEEP IT SIMPLE !

2. I HAVE CHANGED INTO A NEW EATING PLAN WITH MORE WHOLE GRAINS AND LESS PROCESSED "DIET" FOOD. STILL WW.. BUT NO WORRIES WITH COUNTING POINTS..

LESS STRESS- MORE FREEDOM.

3. BREAD IS A TRIGGER 'NUFF SAID

4. IN REGARDS TO EMOTIONAL EATING: I AM MORE THAN CAPABLE AND EQUIPPED TO HANDLE MY EMOTIONS THAT COMES AS A RESULT OF LIVING . LIFE WILL CONTINUE TO BRING THE GOOD AND THE BAD EMOTIONS, I HAVE TO DEAL WITH IT. BOTTOM LINE.

DEALING WITH THE EMOTIONS, MEANING FACING IT HEAD ON, STAYING CALM AND STAYING IN TUNE WITH MYSELF AND WHAT GOD WOULD HAVE ME TO DO.

5. ENJOY LIFE !

THIS FAST/ CLEANSE WAS WELL WORTH IT... I FEEL RENEWED AND READY TO LIVE VICTORIOUSLY !!!

aps · **Joined:** Tue May 20, 2008 5:06 am **Posts:** 22

Dear Shiva:
your posts are so inspirational.
I am on my second day and this is my second MC (I did my first one a few years ago before I decided to have my first child).
It is an amazing physical, mental and spiritual challenge ...and ultimately a HUGE reward when you do complete it.
I am not feeling hungry for food at all...except I am feeling hungry for my growth. And it's already happening. More than anything this process is building great awareness on myself. I start thinking about what happens during regular days when we midlessly eat out of habit and we forget how wonderful and fullfilling food is... this process is teaching me to appreciate food more, to appreciate the fact that I will be feeding off my soul exclusively for the next few days.
APS

shivabliss · **Posted:** Wed May 21, 2008 3:22 pm

Each day we choose to either put on the brakes, or the accelerator to our dreams.

How you feel about the fast, or are feeling while on the fast in general depends upon your stance. If you are a spiritual person, you will not care very much if you experience discomfort, and you will actually see how pain is useful. If is a benefit. If you are on the egotistical side when you fast it can be terrifying, because the ego has to give up all it's power to do MC. The small little you has no say on MC. In fact the whole system that has been built has to be stripped away. It makes us insecure because we have lost our power and influence over our day. Fasting is done in a complete state of surrender of our egos. We let go, we let God. Just like they do in AA.

Some of us try to exercise our positions when we fast. We have a natural tendency to want to do it "our" way. Usually the easier, softer, way. No SWF, no lax tea, not drinking enough water, or fasting while still drinking beer or smoking pot. This is definitely a no no on MC. MC must be done clear and clean.

Our egos get put in a noose, and the rickety chair we stand on gets kicked away on MC. It gets kicked by honesty, reality, and truth. There is no ultimate authority when it comes to your fast. You must do it according to the dictates of reason.

The fast can be a painful experience for your ego, but in metaphysical terms, fasting can be a great liberator. It forces us to step back and retreat and take a look at the broader view of our lives. Many things must change after we fast. This we know. We just keep struggling to take the power back which is the real joke. We never had it to begin with. All power comes with complete surrender to the source, to God, to our soft spiritual sides. Our spirits sustain us on the cleanse. We come to the fast as little children. Choosing harmony in each moment, no matter what is coming up for us on the cleanse. We choose to live with compassion for our plight and in peace.

shivabliss · **Posted:** Thu May 22, 2008 5:43 am

"Mind is the main thing and it is the leader." The body is not our identity. Mind is our identity. It is who we are. So from this perspective, working with the mind is the basis of health and healing.

If our mind is loving and peaceful, we spontaneously will become stronger and wiser, even if our bodies have difficulties. The way to achieve this is through the practice of loving-kindness.

shivabliss · **Posted:** Fri May 23, 2008 6:51 am

If a detoxification cleanse is to have any real impact on our lives, it must be done on a regular basis. Fasting one day a week is an amazing thing to do for your body. Fasting for ten days every change of season will change your life. Our fasting program has the power to bring us back from the brink of extinction, by following balance and reason. After the fast, the dominance of our bad habits become loosened. After the fast we feel like survivors of a great battle where we have fought and won, and we have!

Don't underestimate what a forty day fast can do for your spiritual evolution, as well as your health. Any time the ego gets a whack in the mouth, the spirit finds room to move. MC brings new found liberty. By giving up our control and relinquishing our power, suddenly we are able to dream. Our dreams are based on our merit, not our birth right. No one is going to give me a new body, I have to go and get it. Through our merit we succeed at fasting and thus gain the spoils of a job well done, vibrant health.

shivabliss · **Posted:** Fri May 23, 2008 7:14 am

Are you having a hard time getting yourself to begin a fasting program?

There is a heart and spirit inside of you. You will need both to do MC. For to do MC you will have to liberate yourself from your ego, your personality self, the small you, little you. This is natural for your souls progression to uncouple itself from your ego. If you want what I call a "conscious" fasting experience, you will have to control your ego and allow your heart and spirit to win back influence over your life.

Ask yourself what is influencing me in this moment? Is it the strength of m own heart or the power of my living spirit, or is it my ego? Fear always comes from the small separated self separated from Source. Never forget He who walks with you.

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